Pondoff’s Anonymous

Pondoff’s Anonymous is a podcast about recovery, mental health, and all the real sh*t that comes with it. We don’t sugarcoat anything here. This is a place where we sit down, hit record, and talk about what life actually feels like when you're trying to stay sober, stay sane, and stay alive.

Hosted by Chris Pondoff, Jeff Allen, Jakob Miller, and Zoë Mendenall... we’ve all lived through enough of our own sh*t to know that recovery isn’t some pretty Instagram quote. It’s hard. It’s beautiful. It’s ugly. It’s f***ing worth it. And if you’re in it, you get it. If you’re not, you might still learn something. Either way, you’re welcome here.

We’ve had guests from all over — people in early sobriety, people with decades under their belt, folks who’ve buried people they love, folks who’ve come back from the edge. We’ve talked to therapists, musicians, athletes, people you’ve heard of, people you haven’t... but every single person has brought something real to the table.

We’re not doctors. We’re not a program. We’re not here to tell you how to live your life. We’re just here to have the conversations most people are too f***ing scared to have... the ones that might actually help somebody feel a little less broken for a minute.

We record every week at Illinois Recovery Center in Swansea, Illinois. New episodes drop on Mondays. And yeah, sometimes it’s messy. Sometimes it’s heavy. Sometimes it’s funny as hell. That’s life... that’s recovery... and that’s what we’re here for.

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Light in the Dark coffee from Pondoff's Anonymous and LongStory Coffee

Meet Light in the Dark, a bold Colombian dark roast from our friends at LongStory Coffee. Every bag helps support what we do at Pondoff's Anonymous, from real conversations about recovery to sharing stories that remind people they are not alone.

A man sitting alone at a wooden table in a dimly lit wood-paneled bar or restaurant, holding a cup with a straw. There are decor signs on the wall, including one promoting red lager beer, a mirror, and a neon sign for Angry Orchard hard cider. A window with red curtains is to the right.

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PONDOFF’S ANONYMOUS PODCAST

 

Chris Pondoff

On March 25th, 2014, Chris entered rehab with a major in alcoholism and a minor in cocaine after nearly drinking and snorting himself to death following his father’s tragic passing in May of 2012. It was in rehab where Chris experienced God’s real-life love and grace in what he describes as the, “ultimate, profanity-laced screaming match with Jesus” that he obviously lost. He goes on to add that when you, “lose a screaming match with Jesus, or lose in anything to Jesus, you actually end up winning. And that’s what’s f***ing righteous about this whole faith thing.”   

After completing his inpatient stay, Chris has dedicated his life to keeping a close relationship with Jesus and being a better per… let’s just say being less of an a**hole and a little kinder to people. In that pursuit, he has found a real calling to reach a hand out and help those who are at or near rock bottom from painful, suffocating, paralyzing grief and addiction. Chris is the first person to tell you that he’s not some “bible-belting hypocrite” but instead is a real-life sinner that has come to terms with Jesus in such a way that, for him, has been “life f***ing saving”.

Thanks to his newfound relationship with Jesus, one that still often times is profanity-laced, Chris has risen from rock bottom and has turned out to be quite the f***ing family man to a wife that is “way out-of-his league” and an amazing son in which he is “undeserving”. His life is now dedicated to showing people that there is indeed joy to be had in a life of recovery, and that for those that are residing in the dark, lonely world of grief and addiction to always remember that God’s light of hope and abundant life will always, always overcome the darkness.

Let us pray.

 
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Jeff Allen

Jeff, a creative force based in Belleville, IL, near St. Louis, MO, is a musician, videographer, and mental health advocate. After years of searching for answers to the emotional highs and lows that dominated his life, he was diagnosed with cyclothymia—a mood disorder characterized by less severe but still challenging emotional fluctuations. Armed with this understanding, Jeff found an approach that worked, bringing clarity and healing to his life. Through his creativity and insights, Jeff offers listeners a thoughtful perspective on overcoming mental health challenges.

 

Zoe Mendenall

Zoe Mendenall is a social worker and community builder based in St. Louis. She earned her MSW from Washington University in August 2025 with a focus on domestic social and economic development.

Zoe believes change happens one relationship at a time. She brings a steady, practical approach to recovery work, blending clinical insight with real-world leadership. At Pondoff’s Anonymous, she helps shape conversations around healing, accountability, and community support so people feel seen, equipped, and encouraged to keep going.

 

No Bull Recovery Blog

Jakob Miller

Jakob Miller is the Executive Director at Illinois Recovery Center and the voice behind No Bull Recovery, a straight-talk blog hosted here on pondoffsanonymous.com. His own long stretch in recovery fuels the way he shows up for people… honest, direct, and rooted in the belief that nobody is too far gone to get their life back.

Before stepping into leadership, Jakob worked on the front lines as both a technician and a substance abuse counselor, experiences that shaped his approach to compassionate, no-nonsense care. He helped build Illinois Recovery Center with the goal of offering real help and real hope to anyone ready to take the next step.

Jakob’s work is centered on guiding people toward meaningful, long-term recovery and giving them the tools to build a future they can actually see themselves in. Through No Bull Recovery, he keeps that conversation going… one honest post at a time.